A Proposal That Won’t Eventually Lead To Divorce….

Synonyms for Divorce-dissociate, divide, disconnect, split, disjoin. We like to think of it more in terms of Ernest Hemingway, “The first draft of anything is shit.” If you look up the definition of that word, well you may find a picture or two of some men you once knew.  We are not bitter.  Though it may seem we are.  We just find that honesty and sarcasm go a long way in the healing and growing process.  There are good things that come from divorce.  We became friends after L’s divorce. (By the way please allow us to break in for a moment and share that while we are trying to start this blog, a one year old is banging dog dishes while two girls are single handedly destroying the kitchen around us.  Let’s also also mention the 2 obnoxious german shepherds running into the table and almost spilling our wine and L’s husband turning up the TV as we try to get him to understand Silence of the Lambs, even if it’s the TV version, is not appropriate for kids.  Although he earned creativity points for trying to justify it by saying it teaches kids about stranger danger.  He did not watch it btw…. Meanwhile, L’s 9 year old just asked us “who is Magic Mike?” Disclaimer-she read the cover of  People Magazine.  This all happened in a matter of 5 minutes.  Can anyone relate?)  K’s wonderous everyday life is not present……this sweetness described is all L’s.  Jealous much? Believe it or not, we wouldn’t trade this insanity for anything. We may not be in a place that everyone would call glamorous….But divorce brings us to a different place in life and we want to welcome you to ours.

Now that we have intrigued you, allow us to introduce ourselves……

L (37) Married her highschool sweetheart (insert vomit noise) at the immature age of 24.  Married for 6 1/2 years when I came to my senses and made the best choice of kicking him out.  Of course it helped that I didn’t like his girlfriend (the office mattress and I affectionately will still refer to her as Serta).  During that time I did have 2 beautiful daughters so not everything sucked.  While I was not really looking for any kind of relationship after the divorce, one invited itself into the passenger seat of my truck one night.  After a mutual friend assured me he wasn’t an axe murderer, we began dating.  So here we are.   I am remarried. Living the dream while adding another baby to the mix of our blended family. All the while, working hard to keep my sanity while fumbling through an attempt at co-parenting.  But I am alive, I have the love of my kids and husband and I have wine!

K (32) Someone once told me I am a butterfly that is hard to be caught.  And anyone who catches me would be very lucky.  What he didn’t tell me was to be careful who caught me.  Lesson learned!  Married 5 years to a reflection of what I was hoping he was, but wasn’t, I too however had a child, so like L not everything sucked.  My blogging adventures will be different because I am still single.  I will be navigating my way through the adventures of life and some dating while living the single-mother life.  However, I am still looking for that map……you know the one.  The one with the treasure at the end.  Let me tell you I have already been given the one with the sand traps, quicksand and a heaping bag of scallywags. I still have my Faith and keep my heart ready for my journey.

So sit back, relax and realize as you read our posts something we didn’t realize at the beginning of our divorce journeys……..you are not alone, we are not the only ones.  The saying, “Let go and Let God” helps but so do really good hiding spots and lots and lots of wine. (Mind you again while all this is being blogged L is feverishly trying to ignore the 2 kids arguing behind her, the baby destroying the house and wishing the husband would get home with more wine already!!!!)…..(K is thinking…let’s get a new adventure started!)